Thursday, February 14, 2008


If you have watched television anytime in the last 10 years, chances are you have heard many versions of the word "love" being thrown around like a beachball. what I mean is, the words "I love you" are used so much, that I don't think people really understand or stop to think about what they are saying. Is it any wonder that these generations of young people are growing up so unsure of what "love" is?

November 5th of this year my husband and I will celebrate 20 years of marriage. If I say something like "20 years of wedded bliss", my husband will no doubt note the sarcasm : ) After being with me all these years he's learned that I'm a master at sarcasm : ) It hasn't been a walk in the park, that's for sure. In fact, we could probably stand as poster children of what NOT to do if deciding whether or not to get married. But by God's grace, some how, we've made it this far. Our minds, bodies and senses of humor, in tact... Often times, I think that is our saving grace, our sense of humor... Several years ago, at a particularly rough spot in the road, Don mused to me, "Sometimes, you gotta laugh, to keep from crying..." yup, that's for sure...

What we have learned from God's grace in our marriage and from what the Church teaches, is that love, is a choice. There have been numurous times that I haven't really liked my husband, and I'm sure that he can say the same about me.... but there has never been a time that I haven't loved him. He is my love, my life. Together we have faced family crisis, poverty, opening a business, closing a business, bankruptcy, unexpected pregnancies, sickness, loss of our parents, change of jobs or careers and any number of other stresses that have tempted each of us to pack our bags and head for the door. Yet, here we are. Imperfect beings that we are, together, still. God gives us the stregth to take those hardest times and give them to Him. To trust in Him. Love is a choice. We made that choice almost 20 years ago, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, til death.... If only more people would think about those vows that they make before God more seriously before leaving their marriage.... The "better", "richer", and "health" parts aren't usually too bad, but it's the other side of those circumstances that can do you in...

God loves us with agape love. Unconditional love, regardless of how we are. When you choose marriage as your vocation and you make those vows before God in His Church. We are promising to love one another with the same unconditional love. Short of threat of bodily harm to one by the other, or to the children, marriage is forever. We are called to help each other to desire and attain heaven for all eternity. While we are not called to try and change one another, we ARE called to look deep in to ourselves and what we can do to be a better spouse to one another. It takes maturity, humbleness, humility, and Faith. Remember the saying "True love means never having to say 'I'm sorry'"? Horse pucky.... True love means "hard work", "pain", "sacrafice", "humbleness", "humility", "trust", AND "forgiveness". It means your life is no longer your own, but part of something bigger. True love is not for the faint of heart : )

So, on this day set aside for love, St. Valentine's Day, Donald, my love, be mine... now and forever! I love you!

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